Keeping Pace with Fibromyalgia

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By Tamara Peters
updated on 06/20/2007 at 11:06AM

Published on: June 7, 2003
article reprinted from Suite101.com

I know, I know - I can hear you all groaning now. Pacing is a subject near and dear to all our hearts is it not? ;-) Due to several Fibro Friends’ discussions I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about this subject. I have noticed, for some time, a recurring theme in many of our conversations. Almost daily we’re all bemoaning the fact that we’ve overdone it yet again and are suffering the results. Do you see where I’m headed with this? We have to ask ourselves why this is such a recurring theme in many of our conversations? It isn’t that the concept is difficult to grasp. We all know the drill by now:

Prioritize activities, take frequent breaks, know our limits, listen to our bodies, limit activities known to exacerbate symptoms and bring on flares, and all that jazz.

So the question still remains - why is it so difficult for us to actually practice what we all tend to preach? The following are just a few of my thoughts on the subject of pacing, or rather non-pacing I should say:

• Knowing and doing are two different things. Of course we all know that pacing is something we should be doing daily, but actually putting that knowledge into practice is another matter entirely. It requires a concerted effort, and presence of mind (fibro-fog often makes this most difficult), and more than a bit of planning, to convert and render the information in our heads into a workable strategy for daily living. I think often times we are just so busy doing that we haven’t actually stopped to think about how we are doing it, or whether the way we are doing it is to our advantage or not. Most of us seem to be chronic over-doers who carry on regardless of the pain until sidelined by a nasty flare. Just as often we may not see the connection between one incidence and another (cause and effect) until it’s too late; hence the flare.

• Old habits die hard. If it is our nature to rush headlong through life doing things the way we have always done them, regardless of being diagnosed with a chronic illness, then more than likely that is what we are going to continue doing. We are creatures of habit. Most of my adult life I have designated Saturdays as cleaning day. It was my habit to clean my house, from top to bottom, in one fell swoop. Granted, this usually took me anywhere from four to five hours to accomplish, but I was able to accomplish this more often than not. It took me a very long time to come to the realization that this was no longer possible. I found my breaks becoming longer and my periods of cleaning becoming shorter. Obviously, this system was no longer working for me. Now it may take me a week to accomplish what I once could in an entire day. Subsequently, I’ve managed to let go of my expectations of having a perfectly cleaned home, and try to focus on what really matters to me instead. Pacing is a skill I’m still struggling to master.

• Acceptance. It occurred to me that one of the main reasons we may have difficulty performing pacing, on a daily basis, is that we still have not fully accepted the fact that we not able to do all that we once were. We may have accepted the fact that we have a chronic illness, with limitations, but we still have not accepted all that this entails. Knowing our limitations doesn’t mean that we should never test these limits or stretch our boundaries; instead, it just means that we are mindful, vigilant, and sensible when doing so. Acceptance may mean different things to different people. To me, it means owning our illness by acknowledging the effect it has on our lives, and learning to live well in spite of it. Until we achieve total (body, mind, and spirit) acceptance we may be doomed to being chronic over-doers who overburden ourselves ‘til we crash and burn.

• Perfectionism. This is not to imply that we all think we are perfect. It simply means that many FMers are driven, Type- A personalities, who have the constant need to be in control at all times. When a job is just as easily done by someone else we tend to think that we must do it or it will not get done - at least not to our standards. We tend to fuss about the minute details of everything we do, and leave no stone unturned in our pursuit of a job well done. It is extremely difficult for us to let go of control and hand the reigns over to someone else. Often, we carry on to the point of exhaustion knowing full well that we will pay for it in the end. Sound familiar?

Originally, I had planned to do a typical ‘Pacing’ article by providing the usual litanies, but it occurred to me that we might find it a bit more interesting to wander off the beaten path and look at it from a different perspective, exploring some of the possible reasons behind our seeming resistance to this concept. In next month's article we will take a closer look at the particulars of pacing. I hope you will share your thoughts, and experiences with pacing, or non-pacing, as well.

Tamara Peters works with Suite101.com in the following capacities:

Managing Editor: Medicine and Diseases
Contributing Editor: Fibromyalgia Friends
Associate Editor: Coping with Fibromyalgia-I&II CpE

Article originally printed at http://www.suite101.com/article.cfm/16528/101194

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